Monday, July 16

The Place of Facebook in Pen Palling

Hello all,
I want to pose a question to you all.  One I think is very valid in today's age and technology.  When do you friend a pen pal on Facebook? 
Compared to almost everybody else I know in the Facebook community, I am very very picky about who I friend.  Part of that is a police officer friend of mine that  cautions me of security risk and identity theft.   Part of it is that I tend to be a very private person and do not to share my life with just anybody.  Finally have you ever seen the movie Catfish? Another reason why I tend to be selective.
 I know the younger generations are less guarded and I have friends who are "friends" with thousands of people.  I have no desire to be that popular.
Personally my criteria consists of at least a year's worth of communications and a desire of both parties to share our lives more fullywhich is often discussed in letters prior.   These people I tend to feel a higher connection to.  Than one party initiates the invite to the other and there you have it.  So far I have 5 pen friends that I felt more comfortable with and have friended and 2 others I have asked. 
Let's open a discussion, when do you friend a pen pal on Facebook?   Are you okay with sharing that much of yourself?



  1. Hi!
    My personal facebook is a pretty limited area and I don't really share an awful amount of personal information. If a penpal who I'd gotten to know over the course of a few months wanted to be friends I would certainly add them.

  2. That is a good question! Right now, I only have 2 pen pals that are also Facebook friends. I think the only weird part to me is that I won't have as much to write about if they can see what's going on day-to-day with my life! Then again, I don't post that much on Facebook.

    As far as being a private person, I certainly am not. For me, writing letters (especially to strangers) is probably one of the most honest and vulnerable things I can do, so becoming friends with any of them on Facebook wouldn't bother me one bit.

  3. My Facebook is pretty dull ... mostly I use it to see pictures/videos/updates from my children about them and my grandchildren. I find Twitter to be MUCH more fun when it comes to connecting online with penfriends. Sometimes a simple tweet can spark a letter/postcard out of the blue.

  4. Catfish was awesome.

    One thing I think this generation would do well to consider is the over-sharing... nothing is sacred anymore. We broadcast every little thought or whim as if it all has equal importance. One thing I like about penpalling is it is just a glimpse into someone's life, very intentional, and also very personal, quite opposite most social networking sites. I myself fall victim to all these traps and I'm trying to get out of them, but it's difficult (which is why I've quit & restarted my myspace/facebook profile at least 5 times in the last 6 years). =P

  5. I'm not on FB, that's too intrusive. I'm kind of Old fashion, and prefer to build a friendship slowly and carefully.Letter after letter;like in old times.

  6. Tara I disagree a bit. I could still write a long letter, but i do not tend to over share as Ciara. I like some mystery, plus my job is against us posting anything regarding to it.

  7. I definitely understand where you're coming from, Becky. Of course everyone has different levels of comfort :) I don't share everything with every single one of my pen pals but, personally, wouldn't have a problem answering (pretty much) any question from them.